After eloping in the New Orleans French Quarter, Lucy Homewood discovers curious details about Drake, her gorgeous but brooding groom. Though their sexual chemistry is on fire, they haven’t yet slept together. She sets out to uncover who he is and she simultaneously steps into her own power.

To revive his tanking funeral home business, Drake and Lucy move into a castle on the Atchafalaya River, where he can expand his death product line. Ghoulish creatures, bat colonies, corpses, a werewolf, and a blood cellar horrify Lucy. She is terrified her husband is a vampire and that his sexual problems are vampiric.

Lucy's deep spiritual life and work as a writer invite the entrance of Saint Hildegard, who provides warnings to Lucy as they fly over the nighttime sky. Torn between her commitment to her true love and her own self-preservation, she calls upon Mina, her best friend, a drag queen and intuitive, as well as Jonathan, her ex-boyfriend, a Medieval scholar, and Dr. Maria Van Helsing, a psychologist and priest. Together, they create a plan. Their ritual will either turn Drake to dust, or restore him to human form (a 1% chance the latter will work).

Once they trap Drake, they discover he is pregnant. On his upper thigh is a cyst, where a sack of vampire babies grows. Committed to his resurrection, the team wraps him in death garments. Her advisors instruct Lucy to lay in the tomb with him for 7 days so he can absorb her human kindness.

In front of a mass of churchgoers, Lucy slowly unwraps Drake, knowing that she will either face his immediate decomposition, or his return to human form. The wrap drops and he stands up a man. He falls at her feet and asks her forgiveness. She raises him. They kiss all the way to the bedchamber, where they make passionate love.